Pillow Pets: the toy taking the country by storm!

     It's a pillow, it's a pet, it's a Pillow Pet! Ah, the commercialized piece of fluffy plush known as a Pillow Pet. Pillow Pets have an advantage that most products do not have: they serve no real purpose. They don't launder your clothes, they don't drive you places, which means that Pillow Pets have nothing to live up to. That means that they don't need to use any of those commercial tricks that you find in, say, make-up advertisements. Pillow Pets can fill up their advertisements with those adjectives that don't promise anything: in the case of the photo, "huggable." What the hell does huggable mean? I'm pretty sure other toys don't disintegrate when your child wraps their arms around it. Really, I guess they only reason this stuffed animal has risen over others is that it does two things (sort of:) it gives your child a toy and a pillow.

     Let's look at the spin-off: the Happy Napper.This is, like many other spin-offs of popular products, was unsuccessful. The idea behind it is that a child does whatever the hell they want during the day with the toy, and at night they turn it into a house. There are two flaws in this idea, however: one, in the words of the move Big: "What's so great about a building?" and also, though some kids will think it cool, what about kids who would rather not see their unicorn or whatever be inverted and find their innards to be a castle?

    I don't know how to end this, so here is a quokka: